Motley Murmurs
Art • Travel • Writing
A place where the motley murmurs of the human heart can be expressed, where words, poetry, photography, and stories come into light, pushed from the dark hole in the walls of our soul where they are usually kept. I invite others to gather here as well to express our own motley murmurs. In here we can share our creative endeavors and have frank, kind, considerate, and civil discussions about life, the universe and all it has to offer.
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Adventurous Soul

Travel and adventure are passions that were instilled in me at a very young age. I grew up with access to two hundred acres of pastures land, most of it wooded, where my sister, my cousins and I would disappear for hours on end. We learned how to tell direction and time from where the position of the sun. Never was there a meal missed! We spent our time digging in the mud, raking piles of leaves in to blueprints for houses (although we didn't know that's what it was called), played hide seek in the dark, went on long 'excursions' during the day to explore, and built hideouts in the trees.

As I grew older my love for adventure grew as well. And it changed. No longer was two hundred acres enough. I wanted the world! In college, or thereabout, while I was working part-time retail, I began to plan out how I could intertwine my love of travel with the need for money. I didn't want a job that required me to travel. I wanted a job I can take with me while I travel. So, one day after nearly eight years in retail I straight up quit with this silly notion I would, should I put my mind to it, find a remote position with a company that will let me take my job with me.

Exactly one year later, to the very week I quite retail after a year of jobless disappointments and frustrations, I got an interview with a local health insurance claims processing company. I was hired on the spot! Thank the Lord! Except it was only part-time and it was not a remote position. I thought to myself, surely after a year or two I can ask if they would consider letting me work remote. I put my nose to the grid stone. I worked all hours I was given and then some, all the while squirreling my money away. And lo and behold, seven months into working with this company they announced the installment of a remote system. Hallelujah!

I began to work from home. At the same time I began to make preparation for a dream road trip I started planning back when I worked in retail. A few months into this new job I bought myself a little used truck, since the car I was previously driving died while I was coming home from the start of the last week working retail. Borrowed my dad's car for that last week. Meanwhile I found a shell for my truck, recalled those hideout building skills to buildout the bed into a camper with a platform bed, storage, a mini frig, and a 100w solar panel system to power it. It far exceeded a house made out of a pile of leaves, I can assure you.

The original road trip was supposed to be across the southwestern states from Texas, where I live, and up the Pacific Coast Highway to the Canadian border. I would then cut across to visit Yellowstone NP and some friends in CO on my way back. But, every summer for the past few years, my dad would fly to Alaska with his brother to visit their friends for a few weeks. So I decided, why not drive through Canada and meet them? And you know what? I did.

In the summer of 20017, six month after going remote, it was just me, my truck and the dog I had at the time. We were rubber warriors cast adrift of the every day normal routine. I worked in the mornings. Darby, the little black and white pup, would take a nap. In the early afternoons we would go for walks and explore wherever it was we parked to make home for the night. But the rest of the day, if we did not stay in the same place more than one night, we traveled onward, slowly inching our way west and then north across the continent. And, you know what? We visited Jasper NP and Banff NP on the way back, as well as Yellowstone NP!

Darby was 13 on that trip. A dog is never too old for adventure, but her age did have to be considered. Certain precautions were made to insure she was comfortable and happy. She loved every second and I saw a change in her. It was subtle, something only I would notice. I adopted her from a friend when she was 6 yrs old. She had abandonment issues, so it took us some time to really click but when we did, it was more solid than with any other pet I've had. I think, on this trip, she truly came to understand that I would never leave her, never abandon her and would always protect her, and when the time came I would walk her to the very end of her life. We were closer than ever before by time we returned to our Texas home. Sadly little Darby dog passed away in Feb 2020, a year ago this month, at the wise old age of 16 from acute liver failure. I stayed with her, walked her to the finish line just like I promised. For at least the last 5 years of her life, when I began working remote, we were together all day, every day, and my heart aches when I look around and she isn't there. I miss her, and still think about her every day. If I can find another dog that loves adventure as much as that little pup did, I will be the luckiest girl in the world.

To end on a more joyous note, four months of living on the road, making home where I park for the night, cooking meals on a gas stove and driving for hours through pristine landscapes, and making awesome new travel friends, got me hooked for life. Unfortunately I have yet to do something like this again, although I have taken a few other shorter trips. By 'short' I mean one month long. But that trip to Alaska and back cemented in my soul an unwavering craving for adventure. And I hope it never leaves.

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Sunshine in the Rain

When I was young
I never really understood
how the sun could shine
when it rained

In the years of my youth
I wondered how golden rays
could slip past grey clouds
and how the pouring rain
could not keep the sun at bay

now that I'm much older
I realize grey clouds
and times of darkness
do little to hinder a life
yearning for the sun to shine
and finding a Son of the divine

now that I'm more aware
often time my life is rain
and my path canopied in clouds
but I know daylight always shines
no matter the descending veil of darkness
for He is the sun who's never truly gone

now that I'm wiser
I realize that everything dies
and when clouds rush in
the Son will be my hope
just as He has always been

now that I'm old
so near to the shining Son
where darkness and grey clouds
do not dare to send the rain
to touch a wayward soul warmed
by a life beckoned into eternity

now that I'm dead
he gathers up my soul
from under the clouds and rain
paints it in vibrant colors
borrowed from the evening sky
to meet me in my sleeping
and greet me in my ...

00:00:59
Learning New Skills and Overcoming Fears

Yesterday was an excellent evening for a riding lesson. Here's a short and sweet lope on Fancy, the best little mare there is! It's not the length of the lope that matters as much as how I apply what I have learned this past year and a half to achieve the desired results. In other words, it's quality over quantity!

When I first began loping the transition between trot and lope stirred up this odd sharp fear at the back of my mind that made me clinch up and tighten muscles and raise my heels...all of which hindered sitting correctly in the saddle. I don't know why there was fear about loping because I love going fast but it took me about half a year to overcome it. That strange few seconds of fear grew incrementally smaller with each lesson. Once I overcame it, or rather took control of that fear, everything began to fall into place. The lesson in this, I think, is that the fear is real but it can also be what we make of it. And there are times we have to ignore the fear and just do the ...

00:00:40
We are Giants

We are immeasurable in the face of trial and adversity. This, we must strive toward even when the vast and complex realities of life leave me with little breath in which to satiate the capacities of this tiny and fragile frames that I have been given. Though my body may be small and limited, my soul, my spirit is unbound and strong. It cannot be contained so long in such a contriving state without striving to seek out the provision of freedom: to roam, to explore! Though my mind and the minds of my fellow humans cannot comprehend all the great reaches of both heaven and earth, we are more than mere trivial existences living in a world made of temporary riches and prolonged fears. Someday we will become more than we ever could have imagined. More than anything we could have expected. Until comes that day, we must brim with the joys and hopes of a more commodious world for we are giants living in a land made for imps.

Ponderous Anticipation in the Waiting

I leave a piece of me with every trip I take, and I take with me a piece of every place that I leave. - Me :)

There I was on Dog Beach in Ocean Beach, CA. I though staying at a pet-friendly hotel at Dog Beach where everyone had a dog would be fun. That maybe I'd get to pet a pup. But I didn't, and while it was fun to see everyone playing with their dogs on the beach, it was also a stark reminder that I didn't have one.

I'll admit traveling without a dog has been easier, but its just not as much fun. It's been three years, and while that space Darby filled in my days as we traveled together has lessened, its still prevalent. There have been moments on this trip where I just sit and wonder what to do next because those were the moments that were filled with eager puppy-dog eyes, floppy ears, a wagging stubby tail, and toe-nails digging into carpet or clicking in the floor.

I'll have another co-pilot someday. Until that day, though, I'll brim with the hopes and joys that come with ponderous ...

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Duskloup Designs - Journals, Notebooks, and other Themed 'Low Content' Books!

Duskloup Designs is my amazon store where I make and sale affordable journals, notebooks, and themed logbooks for all ages and purposes. I find tremendous joy in thoughtfulness and creativity that goes into the process of designing and creating books for writers of all trades. It is my hope that what I have to offer brings a little joy to other's lives.

Browse my inventory to your heart's content for different types of journals, notebooks, diaries, and other themed books!

https://www.amazon.com/author/duskloupdesigns

New Designs Added with Select Titles also in Hardcover.

Prime Available on All Orders

Check back regularly for new designs!

https://www.amazon.com/author/duskloupdesigns

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